On the day my little sister was born – May 24 – my life truly began. My core purpose was in devotion to my sister. In that moment, I became her confidant, protector, interpreter, cheerleader, soundboard, advocate, her big sister. For the better part of our early years, we were inseparable.
Sure, we were 2 years and 4 days apart which made us close in age. But it seemed we were entwined. I was told we slept in the same crib with each other. She wanted me nearby. We shared the same room up until I was 16 and she was 14. There are photos of my holding my baby sister in the stroller and passersby would comment on “how real my doll looked”. She was my baby sister!
When she was a few months old, she would not utter a sound, not a word, yet could be found communicating with only me. I would be the one to alert my mommy and daddy of her needs. I let them know when she was hungry or needed changing. It startled my parents to notice their daughter did not utter any words or sounds as part of her normal development. They began visiting ear, nose and throat specialists to detect any auditory or developmental problems. She was healthy and she was not deaf, one expert simply claimed she was “lazy”. It may have been my mom who decided to keep us apart for a while to see if something would rattle her cage. After a while, sis got to talking and then would not stop.
Throughout our lives, we came together to talk about everything. We shared secrets about everything – boys, school, our parents, dreams for our future, our fears, and heartaches. As adults, a week would not go by without talking and updating each other about what was going on in our lives. My sister was a mom to two great kids – a girl and a boy. It was exactly what she said she wanted when we whispered in our nighttime chats as young teens. My sister was hardworking and unapologetic about what she aspired to do with her life.
With a high school education and strong perseverance, she worked. Her choices defined her stance on everything. She worked jobs that brought dollars to support her kids. She lived in situations that helped with childcare. She provided no-nonsense discipline and exposure to her kids. She made sure to allow her kids to make mistakes so they could learn life’s biggest lessons regarding family, respect, commitment, and loyalty. She was equally as matter of fact with her advice and logic whenever we got together on the phone.
Now what, Linda? After you’ve said all that, what are you willing to do?
Wanda Esalen
I transplanted to the west coast; she chose to remain in the city of our roots. She felt comfort there. The grit and hustle were manna to her. Our calls became more frequent and more involved. At every decision I made in my life, it preceded with a call with my young and super wise sister. She had some amazing things to say. In fact, following every one of my rants or angry tirades, she would say “…now what, Linda? After you’ve said all that, what are you willing to do?”
I have asked that question of myself on tons of occasions and now I am moved to ask you…now what? After the setbacks, the successes and heartaches, the new goals you wish to pursue, now what? I will be covering everything that defines our lives – education & career, faith, family & friends, finances, love, and style & sense of being. I have experienced it all and I want to share those insights with you. Perhaps these stories will seem familiar to you. Perhaps these situations will connect you with the possibilities. Or perhaps, you will get a chuckle out of it. Whatever the case, I hope it will inspire you to take the next “now what?” steps in your life.
I dedicate this blog to my beloved sister who would candidly challenge me, “…now what?”
Ask yourself:
- Are there any goals or dreams I wish to accomplish today?
- Do I have a plan for my self? Perhaps a 1, 3 or 5-year plan.
- What is the vision for my life and my family?
Here are a couple of suggested guides:
- How to set goals and achieve them?
- Seeking God’s plan for your life?
- Creating a vision board or vision plan for yourself and your family.
…now what, Linda.
now what, Linda? 