Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.
Ecclesiastes 4:9 (New Living Translation)
While I was in grad school, most of the class projects I needed to complete were within a group context. Depending on the subject, my instructor would assign random individuals to participate in developing a group presentation. With fingers crossed, I earnestly hoped only the responsible and smart classmates would be assigned to my group to ensure we got the top grade. My hopes fell flat on numerous key occasions. I would get the girl who procrastinated and waited until the last minute to submit her piece of the presentation or the guy who didn’t follow through on critical research. This led me to prefer working alone so I could manage priorities the way I wanted. This method proved effective in most cases. Trying to handle all aspect of the project only made me tired and stressed. Besides, who will look out for me better than me? Consequently, it was not the best way to handle situations, much less live.
Admittedly, I am known for standing up for myself, by myself. I’ve accomplished a great deal without the assistance of others who have been kind enough to offer. However, as Brian Walker (Billy Dee Williams) said to Tracy Chambers (Diana Ross) in the 1975 film classic Mahogany, “Success is nothing without someone you love to share it with.” Looking back over my life, I have been unable to share moments of achievement because I did not allow anyone to come close.
Since the very beginning of time, God created us to be in relationship with other people. In fact, God said it was not good for us to be alone (Genesis 2:18). So, He gave us relationship. God did not culminate the creation of the sun, moon, stars, oceans, and all plants and creatures to end with Adam, but his plan included his partner, Eve. It stands to reason God created us for the purpose of developing and securing friendship and community. God intended for us to work together and help each other through life.
Much of what we’re to gain, learn and experience from healthy relationships reflects the kind of connection God wants to have with us. Yet, a lot of people including myself would much rather live our lives in isolation from others. It is safe. It is a way of controlling what comes near us. I get it! Then, there are those of us who believe as long as they have Jesus, there is no need for anybody else. As spiritually minded as that may seem, the truth is Jesus and Me cannot make it through life alone. Though it could have worked out this way, we are created to be in relationship. We are destined to share life with others.
In the Book of Ecclesiastes, the writer claims there are many things one person cannot do alone. We need others to help us when we fall. We need others to encourage us when we are down. We need people to accomplish tasks in life that are greater than us. The two are better than one formula generates the “more” factor. Families are much more rounded and fulfilled when there are two adults to share the load of raising children with a safe and secure home and serve as models of respect, trustworthiness, and love. I have observed classrooms function more productively when teachers share the load with their teacher’s aids. Financial goals can be reached more easily when two are in partnership to achieve them. Trying to handle trouble with those you trust will only make us more satisfied and less tired and stressed.
Jesus replied, “The most important commandment is this, ‘Listen, O Israel! The Lord our God is the one and only Lord. And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” No other commandment is greater than these.”
– Mark 12:29-31 NLT
Most of us have gone through difficult seasons of life wishing there had been someone in our lives to walk along side them. In places we hate to admit, we really do long for connection and community. Unfortunately, our self-serving nature only wants this if it suits our personal interests. Which is why when Jesus was asked which of all the commandments is the most important, Jesus replied. “The most important commandment is this, ‘…you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” No other commandment is greater than these.” You may consider why God would command such an act of love if not to be in community with another.
God created the Church to be a community of people who love God and love one another. I believe when you and I are surrounded by genuine, grace-filled loving people of God, we can discover people who are willing to walk through life together with us. You do not have to walk through life alone. I have hesitated from developing and maintaining relationships because of the work involved to sustain them. No matter how tempting that may seem. God has provided other people to help you along. And you in turn can also be called to help those in your life.
The simple truth is that we are made for relationships and that in all those relationships we are called to reflect the love of God through our behavior. We need to accept the help of others and let our friends carry us through it, knowing that God is with us all the way, including the safety and security that comes with it.
…now what, Linda
now what, Linda? 